Here’s to Bad@ss Women!
I originally published the blog post below in March of 2023, as we were getting ready for our very first Charm City Romanticon (CCR). ** some information in the blog post below has been updated to reflect the current timeline.
This past weekend (Dec 2024) I promoted to 4th degree black belt at WKD K4G. People often ask me why I train. Why a woman nearing 40 stepped on the mat as a white belt nearly 14 years ago and decided to try a karate class. Why I continue to train and teach in my 50s.
It's actually one of the questions Sensei Monique Washington Jones asks every student at every test. And my answer has definitely changed over the years.
On Saturday, in addition to earning my 4th degree black belt, I watched 21 other young women ranging in age from 7 to 15 years old, and everything from white belts to a brand new black belt, advance in rank. They are my why.
Because representation matters. Because female martial artists are significantly outnumbered by their male counterparts. Because I am dedicated to being on the mat with them as long as I am physically able. To help & guide them along their journey. To provide them with the tools and encouragement to keep going.
This journey has not been easy. It's not always fun. It's not always convenient. But it's always worth it. They are worth it.
I am worth it.
And as we prepare for a new year, another CCR, and even more promotions to 4th degree (3 of our security squad will be promoting to join me at the rank within the next 6 months), I wanted to highlight this amazing karate school, the women who are part of it, and how it is woven through every element of my life—including my bookish life.
As a side note: We are offering a practical self defense workshop Sunday, April 6, 2025 taught by members of our all-female security squad. You can find details for that in the event Facebook group: Charm City Romanticon Attendees
******
There’s a certain amount of badassery that comes with many of my favorite romance novels. Most often it’s in the form of an alpha hero in a romantic suspense or protector novel. But sometimes, there are those gems where the female main character takes front and center as the fierce, feisty, force to be reckoned with.
I have several favorites already and so many more I want to read, but beyond reading about it, I have the honor and privilege to train with and work with some real-life badass women.
For the past 13 (almost 14) years, I’ve been a student and teacher at an all-female karate dojo in Columbia, Maryland- WKD Karate 4 Girls. To call it empowering would be grossly undervaluing everything the school exemplifies, but at the same time, it’s the most encapsulating word for it. Because with that empowerment comes confidence, strength of body and mind, and a sisterhood built on trust, tears, and tenacity.
Read through any good hero story, and you’ll find a plot that extends beyond the mere physical elements of fight scenes and saving the day. You’ll find characters who bond, work together for a common outcome, and reveal the softer side behind the steely protector exterior. Spend time in any dojo, and you’re likely to find the same.
So why on Earth am I writing about protector novels and my dojo in the same blog? Well, because female badasses don’t just live within the pages of a book. They’re all based on someone. A real life badass who existed somewhere at some point and became that author’s muse. Sure sometimes they’re just in the author’s head—perhaps a conglomeration of news stories or characters in other works of fiction. But sometimes, they’re based on personal history, prior occupations, or personal anecdotes from friends.
Sometimes the badasses step right off the page and become your security detail for an event you're hosting. In this case, the fierce Black Belt women of WKD are the security detail for Charm City Romanticon. Realistically, what does that mean? Do we expect to have to break up fights over who gets the last Samantha Christy book on her table? No. Do we expect readers to forget their manners and cut the line, causing an ugly exchange of finger pointing and insults leading to security sending them all to their neutral corners? Nope. Do we expect interlopers from other events to try to crash the Pajamaramapalooza when they realize how much fun we’re having? Well… ok, maybe.
But no, that’s not why we’re having a security detail. Or why it’s comprised of only women. It’s because representation in the field matters. It’s because female martial artists work just as hard for their rank, skills, and respect as men, but are often overlooked or ignored. It’s because badass women are a relevant part of Romancelandia and seeing them in public, and knowing they exist and look just like me and you helps us feel seen and valued too.
So if you’re attending Charm City Romanticon, and you see one of the security sisters wandering the room, stop and say Hi. Ask them about their training—don’t ask them to “show you a move”, but ask them how long they’ve been training, why they train, what they love about it. And why they decided to immerse themselves in a sport that is so predominantly male, requires intense amounts of physical and mental investment, and how it’s impacted their lives outside the dojo. They may just have you convinced to give martial arts a try by the time you’re done with your conversation.
